Author Archives: Becki

About Becki

I'm Becki, I'm 39, and I'm crazy (but also fucking awesome). :) You can follow me on Twitter @Koppur (pronounced Copper, like the color of my hair - Redheads kick ass!) or just adore me here.


Fadó, fadó (Long ago), I had amazing self-confidence.  Even when I was at my heaviest weight of over 350 pounds, I rocked my curves and strutted everywhere I went, drawing appreciative looks from men (and some women).  I know my … Continue reading

Posted in Dating, Healing | Leave a comment

Wow, time flies…

So, it’s been over 2 years since I posted.  In all honesty, I kind of forgot this blog even existed.  But I’m happy I found it, because I want to start writing again.  Quick catch up over the last 2 … Continue reading

Posted in Crazy, Healing | Leave a comment

Two Things I Try and Remember When I’m Having a Rough Day

When my depression hits, I tell myself and try to ignore the sweet tortures she is whispering in my mind. When my anxiety come clawing back, I try to remember and tell myself that whatever is going to happen will … Continue reading

Posted in Anxiety, Crazy, Depression | Tagged , | Leave a comment

I Swear I’m Only One Person

I was so proud and satisfied with myself after building my table this morning. Now I am shaky and weepy and anxious-y.  My mood swings are faster that a buttered kid going down an aluminum slide.  I thought PMS was supposed … Continue reading

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I Ikea, Do You?

Spent the morning building my new kitchen/dinning table.  Ok, maybe not actually building it.  More like like trying to decipher the badly drawn images to figure out what screws into what hole (shut up) and then almost killing my cat … Continue reading

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Feeling Useful

Since going on SSDI, I’ve struggled with feeling useless and like a drain on society and on my family (who, thanks to the fabulous government we have, help me out financially from time to time).  Now, don’t get your poopy-pants … Continue reading

Posted in Depression, Disability, MS, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Cannot Brain Today

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The Appearance of Anxiety

I have depression.  Several types, actually. I have MS. My MS gives me migraines, severe fatigue, tremors, restless legs, body pain, and leg weakness. I have insomnia. I don’t have anxiety. At least, I never have before.  I don’t think.  … Continue reading

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Chicken Butt and Rhino Vagina

For two weeks I was talking to a guy from OKC (OKCupid) named Brian. I wasn’t really too interested, but he seemed nice and I wasn’t talking to anyone else.  We didn’t have anything in common, unless you count the … Continue reading

Posted in Online dating | Tagged , | 3 Comments

Planting and Harvesting, Round 1

Last week I to this fantastic greenhouse/plant store/gift shop and picked up some herbs and veggies for my first round of planting.  (If you live anywhere near Warren, RI, I suggest you visit it! It’s called Frerichs Farm, and they … Continue reading

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